The Bling: Part Two

Ring shopping started off as a disaster but it does have a sweet ending. After we left the last store, Clayton and I discussed our goals for ring shopping because after I fell in love with a completely different ring than we started looking for, it threw him for a loop.

Clayton said that he loved the cathedral setting and always envisioned his wife wearing a classic solitaire in a cathedral style. Being an architect, Clayton also had a sentimental value of choosing the cathedral setting. He told me that in the early centuries when they were building churches they had to build a support system to support the elaborate high ceilings they had created for the cathedrals. They couldn’t build high enough to reach the top so they created buttresses (or in more simple terms, bars) so that it could hold the cathedral walls to support the high ceiling. The buttresses hold the same purpose for the diamond, to hold and support, just like the beautiful cathedrals built centuries ago.

He expressed that he loved the setting because of what it meant to him as an architect and that he would love and support me just like the buttresses. I fell in love with him all over again with his explanation of the cathedral setting. I completely forgot about the other setting I loved and I couldn’t wait to wear my cathedral ring and be reminded daily of the passion he has for me and his love for architecture.

After ring shopping at a total of five stores we were ready to purchase a ring and be done. The experiences I had at each store were very different. I have to come back to my initial disappointment though. When I thought of ring shopping I envisioned angels singing, personal attention, champagne and feeling like a princess surrounded by diamonds. This is not the diamond experience I had at all. I guess ‘hollywood’ set me up for disappointment because I walked into each store with the mindset that I was Julia Roberts shopping on Rodeo Drive (the second round!) or Sweet Home Alabama when Patrick Dempsey says “pick one” and all the lights come on and diamonds are everywhere just glowing awaiting her to pick one! If I ever decide to go into the diamond business I would make some serious improvements in this field or somehow attempt to prepare men and woman what to expect.

One lesson I have learned as a wedding planner and was reminded during the ring shopping process is to manage your expectations. I have seen so many woman disappointed either during their planning or on their wedding day. They either don’t like their bouquet or the groom isn’t involved the way she anticipated. It was a great reminder early on in this process to not be set up for failure due to some fairy tale expectation. Stay present in the moment and try to enjoy them!

Side note to diamond sellers: Have a nice waiting area that is not only male friendly but female friendly too. I am one of the biggest football fans you will meet (go Minnesota Vikings!) but I have no intention of reading Sports Illustrated or GQ magazine. Make the woman feel special. She has dreamed of this moment for longer than she can remember. Have ring settings that fit the woman trying them on. I am more likely to buy something when I can see the whole picture. I can’t visualize it on my hand if the setting barely fits on my pinky and the prongs are set for a five carat diamond. Just a thought.

Before we made a purchase there was still one more place I wanted to go. I had a gut feeling we would find what we were looking for here and I should have gone with my gut and skipped all the other shopping! I was so anxious the night before my final ring appointment. I knew this was the end of the ring shopping journey. I was relieved.

I got up early and was ready to go. I was going solo today. Clayton said he trusted me to make the final decision and he was tired of shopping. I was supposed to meet my friend Connie who recommended the jeweler to me at 9AM at my office. She was running a little late and minutes felt like hours. I couldn’t wait to get the store. Connie and I drove to Market Center and arrived to chaos. Market was formally in session and there were people everywhere. We had to park over a mile away and we took a bus to get to the building. Any other day this would have been no big deal but when you can’t wait to get somewhere, especially to see diamonds, taking a long detour on a bus just makes you more anxious!

Janice, the jeweler, came to meet us and we went up a few flights of escalators and finally were at her showroom. She asked me if I wanted to look around but I politely said no. Clayton and I had already agreed to get the solitaire in a cathedral setting and there was no reason for me to continue looking for a different one. She sat me down and she pulled out the loose stones. I love this part! All the stones are in the little pieces of paper. It seems so odd that something so valuable is kept in a small piece of paper. I have found that odd this entire process. Janice was very educational. I thought I was already pretty educated. I have been to 6 diamond locations and knew exactly what I wanted. However she showed me even more techniques to look at the diamonds and how to see good ones and how to determine what I liked. I am once again reminded of how dreadful the diamond industry is and how easily excited and overwhelmed young men must been when shopping for this significant piece of jewelry. I truly believe that knowledge is power and that is including diamonds.

Janice pulled a few stones from the description I gave her. Two of them I really liked and they were beautiful. After much back and forth I finally made a choice. I love the diamond. It’s the perfect size, it has great color and the clarity is clear with just a slight inclusion. You might think having an inclusion is a bad thing but mine is on the side of the stone and I like that is identifies my diamond. I know that when I look at it I will know where that mark is and be sure that its mine.

After my ring shopping experience I have learned what I love and don’t love about diamonds. I like a higher quality of color. The slightest hint of yellow turns my eye away. I like clean diamonds. Meaning when you look at the diamond through the magnifying glass there are no black spots and there are no cracks. You can see that is clear all the way through. I have learned so much during this process. I learned that diamonds are a lot like people. Their ‘stats’ don’t necessarily define who they are. Like a quarter back who can throw the football better than anyone in the state of Texas and can lead a team with presence on the field that is irreplaceable, but because he is not 6’3, a college scout doesn’t look twice at him. Diamonds can be very similar. Their ‘stats’ of cut, clarity and color may not be ideal but some stones are worth taking a second look at.

I was really excited to tell people about my ring but I also didn’t want to go overboard because he officially had not proposed yet. I called my sister and mom and they were both excited for me. You know the rest of the story. Clayton proposed and I said yes! So here is the Bling!